Changes can be great. A new car. A new home. A new job. A new friend. A new love. A new burger on the menu at your favorite fast food joint. The scale moving in a positive direction whether you are trying to lean or to build. Change can be so good. Positive change is often disguised as pain, sadness, hurt, and tears. But sometimes change is devastating. No mater how hard you look you can’t find the happiness in this change.
You are feeling tired. Sick. Loss of appetite. You hold out for as long as you can. You figure being a mom or a dad or a boss or a college student is just catching up with you. Life is catching up with you.But then it gets to the point where it may be time to see the Dr. You see the dr. You walk in as yourself and you walk out changed. Changed in a way that you never expected. Changed in a way that will destroy all the lives around you.
You just never know when you may get news that things have changes in your body and there is no amount of meds that can cure you. Nothing you do will fix the damage that is already done. One month you are active and the next month, you can’t breathe and you begin preparing for the worst. You start thinking of the guy you love and how you didn’t fight hard enough. That trip you planned but cancelled because you have the rest of your life to take it. You want to pick up that phone and tell your best friend, whom you have not talked to in years because of a stupid fight, that you miss her and you love her and you need her right now more than you need anyone else, but you can’t. Everything has changed. You find yourself lost, full of regret. Suddenly, you want to be that person, say those things, do those things you have put off because you thought you have forever to live. You don’t. I don’t.
I met someone today who thought she had forever. She found out her days are numbered. Heart breaking to hear her describe her sudden downfall. Planning her last days. I could hardly stand it. I walked away and I cried. And for what ever reason I thought of Oreo cookies. If my days were numbered, I would eat more of them. But my days and your days are numbered.
Eat the cookies. Tell the guy. Call the friend. Take the trip. Live. Live for those who can’t. Live for you. Live for your kids. Laugh. Smile. Celebrate that tomorrow is Wednesday and someone loves you.